THE WORST IS YET TO COME

THE WORST IS YET TO COME
(To the tune of The Best is Yet to Come, by Shannon Greene and Todd N. Terry)

Out of the candidates, we’ve selected the rump.
The words stick in my throat saying President Trump
And now I fear, right here, the worst is yet to come

The worst is yet to come, that’s becoming quite clear
I’m so afraid the harm will be more than I fear

Issuing orders every day.
Brewing un-needed fights.
Closing our borders come what may.
Stepping on precious rights.

The worst is yet to come, cloaked the devil arrives
The worst is yet to come, pray the country survives.

Pray this land survives
He’s certain to go too far.
We used to care about lives.
Let’s not forget who we are.

The worst is yet to come, meaner than it now seems.
The worst is yet to come, out to steal your dreams.

Lyric © 2017 by Robert S. Steinberg, Esq.
All rights reserved

WHAT’S SO GOOD ABOUT THE NEWS?

WHAT’S SO GOOD ABOUT THE NEWS?
(To the tune of “What’s so Good About Goodbye?” by Smokey Robinson as recorded by The Miracles)

What’s so good about the news?
All it does is give me the blues.
Read how Trump can get elected
and how Putin is suspected.
Tell me, what’s so good about it?*
I could have done without it.*
What’s so good about the news?

In the Wall Street Journal today.
Read they’ll take my health plan away.
Though I’m healthy, I’m not wealthy.
And I can’t afford miscues.
Tell me, what’s so great about it?
I’d be OK without it.
What’s so great about the news?

Be like Trump and never read.
What a sheltered life I would lead.
Thinking ignorance is blissful
But that man is just abysmal
Tell you what’s so good about it?
We’d all be dumb without it
That’s what’s good about the news.

Lyric © by Robert S. Steinberg except starred (*) lines verbatim from original song.
All rights reserved.

IT WAS GRAND TO BE RUNNING

IT WAS GRAND TO BE RUNNING
(To tune of “It’s a Grand Night for Singing,” by Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein II, from film “State Fair.”)

It was grand to be running
Campaigning’s one more show
In your White House chair
while they blow-dry your hair
reality may bite your toe.

It was grand to be running.
When promised walls rang true.
Now you’ve been elected
and you’ll be expected
to prove what you really can do.
That wall may fall on you.

Maybe you’ll learn to be calm.
Maybe you’ll learn to go slow.
You might come to see
that the Presidency
is not a reality show.

Maybe you’ll think more than talk.
Maybe you’ll grow to be wise.
Maybe the earth will crash into the sun
and burn up before your own eyes.

It was grand to be running.
Cheer Mr. Pres. your chum.
You don’t see your error
why others feel terror
as “things fall apart”, for some.
“The blood dimmed tide” has come

.Lyric © by Robert S. Steinberg, Esquire
All rights reserved

WELCOME TO ABSURDUM

WELCOME TO ABSURDUM
(To original melody)

Welcome to Absurdum
A place they used to call America.
And if you’re coming to the USA
Best pack a bullet-proof vest.
All the crazies live here.
Loaded guns everywhere.
So you’d better steer clear.
God bless America.

Welcome to Absurdum
Now look who’s vying to be president.
An egomaniac with a coif.
A lady who wants to wear the pants.
Soon the crazies will vote.
“Open-carry” promote.
Privacy’s in the moat.
Liberty’s a game of chance.

Welcome to Absurdum
A place they used to call America.
Honest Abe’s restless grave.
Sees us fooled all the time.
Oligarchs plot and rule.
Lobbyists selling mule.
Try to live on a dime.
God bless America.

© 2016 By Robert S. Steinberg, Esquire
All rights reserved

HOLD NO HEARINGS

HOLD NO HEARINGS
(To the tune of “Ol’ Man River,” by Jerome Kern and Oscar Hammerstein II, from the 1927 musical show “Showboat”)

Intro

Here we all live by a constitution.
We’ve a High Court to proclaim its voice.
The President submits a nomination.
The Senate confirms or rejects his choice.

Republicans say screw the constitution.
Chances of hearings, not even slim.
“Scalia’s seat is our own for keeping.
Want a new Justice who’ll vote like him.”

Verses

Hold no hearings.
We’ll hold no hearings.
Mitch tells Obama
Spare us the drama.
We’ll hold no hearings.
There’ll be no hearings this year.

And Merrick Garland
Won’t mete out justice.
The cards in our hand
Laid-out say just this.
We’ll hold no hearings.
There’ll be no hearings this year.

Bridge

Democrats can rant and worm.
His nomination we’ll not confirm.
But, heads you lose, tails you lose.
Should President Trump be the one to choose.

Verse

Call us laggards.
Say we’re stonewalling.
Approval ratings
Can just keep falling.
We’ll hold no hearings.
There’ll be no hearings this year.

Lyric © 2016 by Robert S. Steinberg, Esquire
All rights reserved.

 

NOT THE TRUMP

The Republican establishment has suddenly awakened to the likelihood of Donald Trump becoming its nominee for president. That realization has unleashed a desperate campaign to stop his ascent to the party’s nomination.

NOT THE TRUMP
(To the tune of “You’re the Top,” by Cole Porter)

Not the Trump.
Anyone but Donald.
Not the Trump.
How we yearn for Ronald.
No conservative, he’d give us a black eye.
He’s the King of Con.  He’s the Twitter-Don.
He’s a dangerous guy.

Not the Trump.
Got a tiny weenie.
Not the Trump.
Thinks he’s Mussolini.
Cruz gives us the blues, and Rubio’s a punk.
So, the GOP roars in misery,
“To the bars – Get drunk.”

Not the Trump.
Who will stop the Trumpster?
Not the Trump.
Drop him in the dumpster.
This is suicide, a coattail ride we’d skip.
Desperation’s come when Mitt Romney’s
even sounding hip.

POTUS Trump.
Breathes an air of panic.
Not the Trump.
He’d be our Titanic.
He will take us down, this circus clown, this chump.
Groucho Marks’ more presidential.
Not the Trump.

Lyric © 2016 by Robert S. Steinberg, Esquire
All rights reserved.

Note: This is a parody song lyric based on comments of others and/or innuendo in comments of others. Thus, the views expressed are not necessarily those of the author.  The author does not intend this parody lyric to be taken seriously or mistaken for truth.  The contents of this blog are intended as humor and satire of a political process.  This lyric is not intended as a personal attack on anyone and is not published for the purpose of disparaging anyone’s reputation.

GOODBYE BOEHNER

GOODBYE BOEHNER
(To the tune of, “Goodnight Sweetheart,” by Ray Noble and Jimmy Campbell (1931))

Goodbye Boehner.
Thanks for at least trying.
Goodbye Boehner.
We won’t miss your crying

Compromising put you on the rack.
A right wing attack.
Cruz, the leader of the pack.

Goodbye Boehner.
Colleagues celebrating
are no saner
than that gang debating.

None will govern.
No one like George McGovern.
Goodbye Boehner.
Goodbye.

Goodbye Boehner.
Guess you’ve had one rough night.
Good luck Boehner.
You’re not far enough right.
Traitor, pagan.
Exhume Ronald Reagan.
Goodbye Boehner.
Goodbye.

Lyric © 2015 by Robert S. Steinberg, Esquire
All rights reserved

THAT’S NOT FOR ME

Re. The GOP CNN debate

THAT’S NOT FOR ME
(To tune of “But Not for Me,” by George Gershwin and Ira Gershwin)

This was no great debate.
This was a farce.
And I can only state
Trump is an arse.

I’m just not in the mood
for people crass and crude.
Prefer my solitude
to what they parse.

Once Douglas and Lincoln
were not a joke.
They did some deep thinkin’
before they spoke.

Though some folks liked this show.
Ten schmoozers and one schmoe
revealed what they don’t know.
That’s not for me.

Lyric © 2015 by Robert S. Steinberg, Esquire
All rights reserved

KICKING THE CAN ON DOWN THE ROAD – 2015

Congress is back in session.  We can expect a lot of can kicking.  The immigration reform can; the tax reform can; the highway funding bill can, the debt limit can to name some.

KICKING THE CAN ON DOWN THE ROAD
(To tune of “Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head,” by Burt Bacharach and Hal David, Oscar winning song from 1969 Best Picture movie, “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid,” starring Robert Redford and Paul Newman)

Kicking the can on down the road
When responsibility becomes a heavy load
Congress won’t decide
They just kick that old can again a little bit further

Because, to make a decision takes a stand
And taking a stand when an election’s near is banned
Campaign suicide
So, they just kick that old can again a little bit further

But they must surely know
They’re putting on a show there
And we know here
A country kicking cans is heading nowhere

Because, kicking the can on down the road
Is just like the hopping of a narrow-minded toad
Feeling satisfied
But toads never make it to the end of a long road
Your feet are free
Kick them out of DC

Lyric © 2011, 2014, 2015 by Robert S. Steinberg, Esquire
All rights reserved

BIDEN MY TIME – 2015*

BIDEN MY TIME – 2015*
(To tune of, “Bidin’ My Time,” by George Gershwin & Ira Gershwin)

I’m Biden my time.
To hesitate is no crime.
That Clinton’s lead is shrinkin’
S’ got me thinkin’
Biden my time.

I’m Biden, I’ll say.
There’ll be no ‘nouncement today.
While other Dems are frettin’
Out vote-gettin’
I’m Biden my time.

Next month, next month.
I might be decidin’
This month, this month.
Laid-back, I’m just Biden.

Biden is my name.
I’m only doin’ the same.
Got no Trumped-up ego.
Not this amigo.
I’m Biden my time.

Next month, next month.
I might be debatin’
This month, this month.
I’m here cogitatin’

And Biden my time.
Though some folks say its high-time.
Not runnin’ and not quitin’
But just fence-sittin.
Biden my time.

Next month, next month.
I might be campaignin’
This month, this month.
Rumor it keeps rainin’

I’m Biden my time.
But don’t be bettin’ your dime.
No one could ever hush me.
And they won’t rush me.
I’m Biden my time.

Next month, next month.
I might throw my hat in.
This month, this month.
I’m the lamb they fatten.

Biden my time.
No rush to roll in the slime.
Campaigns get so ugly.
That sleeve won’t tug me.
I’m biding my time.

Next month, next month.
I might jump in fightin’
This month, this month.
Sidelines feels invitin’

For Biden my time.
You know the kind of guy I’m.
Some fishin’ and some waitin’
And ruminatin’
Biden my time.
Biden my time.

*Also see “Biden My Time” post of October 14, 2012

Lyric © 2015 by Robert S. Steinberg, Esquire
All rights reserved.